I can’t believe it, but we’ve officially been
on the East Coast for over a year now. We left the Saturday after Thanksgiving
in 2012 for that loooong ass trek across the country. Just me, Mike, Tuffy, and
Gizmo. Oh man did that truck stink like dog sweat and cheeseburgers by the end
of the trip. Not really a lot has happened since then even though it feels like
it should have. We live here now, we both have new jobs here, we live in a new
apartment…and that’s about it. no big news, no big life changes. Just living in
another town with the same ole’ stress and the same ole’ lives. Except, you
know, we’re super happy that we’re in a bigger area and close to one of our
favorite cities in the world.
Since I don’t have anything important or deep
to write about our first year here, instead here are some things I’ve learned
in the last year:
1) People in Southern Maryland cannot drive.
California drivers may be intense, but at least they know what they’re doing.
2) People in Southern Maryland don’t know what
double yellow lines mean. Alright, that’s pretty much what #1 was saying,
but oh man half the accidents in this
town are because of those damn double yellows.
3) People
this close to DC/Baltimore/Annapolis/Alexandria really don’t appreciate it.
When people here talk about how far a drive it is to Annapolis (1.5hrs) I
always laugh. It was 1.5 hours to the nearest Target where we moved from. We
have no problem driving that far to be in a beautiful, water-side town filled
with great restaurants and shops. Worth
it!
4) People
here think their commute is bad and I find that funny. You can take the metro.
It may be late or suck sometimes, but at least you’re not stuck in LA rush hour
traffic!
5) People
don’t take their kids into DC even though it’s so damn close. The museums are
free, the zoo is free, and your kids are an hour and 45 minutes away from so
much culture…take them dammit!
6) Just
because you’re on the East Coast doesn’t mean they know how to handle weather.
The schools here close if they THINK it’s going to snow. Apparently that’s not
a California thing like I thought it was.
7) The East
Coast makes me fat. Okay not really, but not running as much because of the
cold and laziness has made me fat. And I blame the East Coast.
8) Taking a
red eye from CA to here is way easier than going the other direction.
9) It’s
windy here too, it’s not just a Ridgecrest thing (dammit).
10) FIVE
GUYS IS BETTER THAN IN N OUT SUCK IT CALIFORNIA.
11) Being
near the water makes me happy. I never knew this about myself, but working near
the water and being able to look out at it whenever I want brings me this weird
happiness and peace I never experienced before.
12) Not
having to put on moisturizer at night because I no longer live in the desert is
weird.
13) My hair
is huge here. Just huge and dumb and huge.
14) Mike
hates rain. Who knew?
15) People
who live in Maryland have an accent. A very distinct accent that I had never
heard before.
16) Old Bay
apparently goes with everything.
17) Living
somewhere where people take great pride in their industry and their town is
really nice. Watching people cheer wholeheartedly for the oyster shucking
competition at the Oyster Festival kind of melted my icy little heart.
18) Whoopy
pies?! I mean come on. Those things are gooood.
19) If you
live in the second story apartment of a three story building, you never ever
have to turn on your heat and it’s kind of awesome.
20) The only
road kill here is deer and it’s way more depressing than other kinds.
21) People
here can tell if the crab in their crabcakes is local or not.
22) You’ve
never had a crabcake until you’ve had a locally-sourced one in my town. Holy
hell.
And that's about it for now even though I'm sure there could be a lot more deep and important things I've learned. I do love you Maryland, you weird little place.
(Photo by Earl P. of the Drum Point Lighthouse)