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Okay, I cannot decide whether or not to have kids. We decide to go for it, we start trying, we change our minds, we decide never to do it, get relieved, change our minds again. It's effing stressful. Here are some reasons why I'm scared of babies:
How on earth do you ever know you're financially stable enough?
I will have to be a working mom and I am not even pregnant and I already have working mom guilt.
It is going to be really rough to get a good amount of maternity leave at my current job.
I will get fat. And stay fat. And the boobs, oh man, I'm gonna have scary boobs.
Babies are LOUD. I mean, right?
The whole "not sleeping" thing.
They are going to inevitably hate me. That just always happens and oh how sad.
My husband and I are both nuts and will end up passing on our nuttiness to that baby.
Boob stuff. Breast feeding. Yikes.
Lots of poop. Poop everywhere.
Speaking of poop...giving birth?!!
Okay I'm done. I think it's kiiiind of obvious that I shouldn't be a parent...
I had to share my mother-in-law's beautiful response to my post. She's really the best.
ReplyDeleteIf everyone waited until they could "financially afford kids" there would be no kids born. You just have to go for it. It does work out.
Every working mom has guilt. You just have to make sure you give the kid the best environment you can when you are not with them, and give them the best of you when you are.
If your job doesn't give you sufficient leave, you file for state disability. They will pick up the financial end of it. If it is the time that is a problem, you stay home for as long as you can, then the hubs stays home for as long as he can.
You will not stay fat after a baby unless you want to. The fat comes off just like all other fat. And the boobs go down to normal or smaller. If you don't want to breast feed, they will give you a shot so your milk does not come in.
Babies are not loud. Your hubs was so quiet I used to have nightmares that I left him home alone while I went shopping.
Babies will sleep through the night by 6 weeks if they are not hungry. Before that you take turns getting up and feeding them, and taking naps when you can during the day.
They are NOT going to hate you. I do understand that girls go through a "hate Mom" period in their teens, but that too goes away. And boys always love their Moms.
You and Mike are not nuts. You are very stable and will make wonderful parents when and if you decide to. And if you decide not to, you don't have to make excuses to anyone. Hell you may change your mind in your 40's and end up with lots of kids. Just relax and go with the flow.
I love you both and want you to be happy. Yes I have grandma envy, but I will get over it. Enjoy your life and the rest will fall into place.
Love you, Mo-in-law