(1) Jealousy: I tend to get very easily jealous of other people. Of how much money they make, their clothes, their looks, their cars, their careers, their bodies. I can get very wrapped up in what I don't have as compared to other people. And that is ugly. Jealousy ain't cute and it is in no way going to benefit you ever. Gross.
(2) Regret: I have made some mistakes in my life. Some were mistakes and some were mistakes. I tend to torture myself with these big or small and relive them over and over and over wishing and hoping I could go back and fix them. Looking backwards and focusing on those things you regret is going to get you nowhere...look forward and plan for the future bitch! (this blog became a pep talk to myself all of a sudden)
(3) Depression: Does depression count as a trait? It's a big part of my personality at least so I'm counting it. I have struggled with depression since I was young; feeling very dark, hopeless, and suicidal. I catch myself repeating the phrase in my head, "I hate her" referring to myself on my bad days and thinking it might be better if I weren't around. These feelings with me, as they do with most people, ebb and flow. There are good days and bad and thankfully, as I've gotten older and more stable, there are much fewer bad days. But it's a pretty ugly trait and one that affects every other part of my life.
This post became such a downer, I'm adding to it a list of my 3 best traits too. Gotta be positive, right? Here they are!
(1) Humor: I'm pretty darn funny if I do say so myself. I'm really good at finding the humor in anything. I love making people laugh and I'm willing to make a total ass of myself to do so. Mike and I laugh all the time and it's my favorite thing about our relationship.
(2) Nurturing: I love to take care of people and be there for them when they need it. The second I hear someone is sad or hurt, I immediately want to (poorly) bake them something, send them a card, and give them big, squishy, inappropriate hugs.
(3) Hard working: I love being lazy as much as the next guy...like I have been for the last 6 months during unemployment...but when I have a job, I will work my ass off. Even for a soul-sucking office job like my last two, I will work my hardest, give them everything, and go above and beyond. It drives Mike and some of my family nuts when they watch me working so hard for not great people, but I can't help it. I just hate walking away from my desk with work not done.
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